The Day I Froze – And How I Learned to Feel Safe Again

It happened on a random Tuesday evening. I had just finished work and was walking home through the crowded streets of Meru. The usual chaos filled the air—matatus honking, hawkers shouting, the scent of mutura sizzling on roadside grills.

As I turned into a quieter street near my apartment, I saw a group of young men ahead, leaning against a wall. My heart skipped. Something felt off.

I told myself, "Relax, maybe they’re just chilling." But my body wasn’t buying it. My breath got shallow. My palms got sweaty. My stomach tightened. Every instinct in me screamed: DANGER.

Then, out of nowhere, a loud bang! A car backfired nearby.

I froze.

I couldn’t move, couldn’t think. My whole body locked up. The group of guys turned to look at me, confused. I must have looked insane, standing there like a statue.

Then, one of them laughed. "Buda, umeogopa nini?" (Bro, what are you scared of?)

They weren’t even thugs. They were just regular guys, waiting for a friend.

I felt stupid. But the fear? It was still real. Even though I was safe, my body didn’t believe it.

Why Did I Freeze?

I later learned that this was my fight-flight-freeze response in action. My brain had mistaken a normal situation for danger and went into survival mode. But here’s the problem—I was never in real danger.

This is what happens in anxiety, PTSD, and panic attacks. Your brain sounds the alarm even when nothing is wrong. And when that happens, your body reacts as if a lion is chasing you.

How I Learned to Feel Safe Again – Grounding Techniques

After that night, I knew I had to find a way to control my reactions. That’s when I discovered grounding exercises.

These simple techniques helped me bring my mind back to the present whenever I felt anxious. Here are the top ones that worked for me:

1. The 5-4-3-2-1 Method

When my thoughts start racing, I do this:

✅ 5 things I can see (The trees, my shoes, a passing car, a shop sign, my hand)

✅ 4 things I can touch (My shirt, my phone, my chair, my feet on the ground)

✅ 3 things I can hear (Birds, a passing boda boda, my own breathing)

✅ 2 things I can smell (My soap, the air)

✅ 1 thing I can taste (I usually take a sip of water)

This simple exercise reminds my brain: I am safe. I am here. Nothing is wrong.

Final Thoughts – Training Your Brain for Safety

It took time, but these grounding exercises changed my life. Now, when I feel anxiety creeping in, I don’t just sit there and panic—I use my senses to bring myself back to the present moment.

If you’ve ever felt frozen in fear, overwhelmed by anxiety, or trapped in past trauma, try these techniques. You CAN train your brain to feel safe again.

Share Your Story!

Have you experienced anxiety? Let's talk about it in the comments below. You can also reach me out on WhatsApp for more support.

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Take care.